i.
the first time i met you, i couldn’t pronounce your name when you introduced yourself. my tongue stumbled over your name as if it became drunk off its syllables alone, to my embarrassment and your annoyance. tongues are a tricky thing— they are kind enough to hide everything you aren’t brave enough to say but cruel enough to make you taste the bitterness of your secrets. i wonder if you still taste her. i wonder if her name tastes like sun or vodka burning on its way down or the cold side of the bed or the things you never said to her or the love you used to share. i hope you spit out the taste of her name when you left her. because i’ve stopped sharing room with other women in the roofs of people’s mouths years ago. it took me a lot of blood and even more tears to teach myself i am too large to share a mouth with someone else— the taste of my name is made of cayenne pepper and tumeric and honey that stings, too potent to mix with someone else. i, too, have the sort of name tongues get drunk on. you do not see that we are the same yet.
ii.
if i had the chance, i’d swallow you. i’d devour the lies you tell yourself and digest the truths you’re courageous enough to admit, i’d take you straight and i’d let you burn on the way down like my throat was born to sting. i wouldn’t hesitate. but i am so frightened that if i dared taste you, it would be her aftertaste that would remain, or if i tried to describe your flavor i’d say her name instead. i can’t kiss with tongue if your mouth is still drunk off the very syllables of her name. because while i’ve learned to say your name correctly, my stomach craves to pronounce it, too. my teeth are sweetened by the very sight of you.
— tongues hold so much more than names (ap 12.21.18)
tbh it amazes me how Ariana Grande’s “Thank U, Next” blew up or ended up being a massive success because based on how it was released, you could tell it was an accidental hit or it wasn’t intended to be a hit. first, it was released on a Saturday evening, which no artists ever do, because it’s textbook 101 to release songs on Friday midnight, which is when the charts reset. sure Ariana released it at the same time Pete’s SNL episode aired but this was just for the execution. Ari put herself at a disadvantage since she lost a day of streams and sales for it. and yeah she intended this just to be her love letter to her exes and herself. second, it only got a lyric video and it didn’t have any radio deals. in fact, Breathing, was intended to be the single her label would promote or what they intended to chart since it got a music video too. it was also her most poppy record from Sweetener. but then after Thank U Next got released, it spurred so many memes, it was a streaming giant that it surpassed Ed Sheeran and Drake’s streams in like the first few days, and then it eventually debuted at #1 in the Hot 100 not only making it her first overdue #1 but also the first #1 debut by a female artist in years since the last song that did that was Adele’s “Hello” in 2015. it broke records left and right with ONLY the single and A LYRIC VIDEO. not even a music video because like most songs that debuted at #1 had a video with it. and i’m glad that they followed suit by filming a music video that was inspired visually by a culmination of movies that greatly impacted pop culture plus having a star-studded cast.. fast forward, it broke the record for most views in 24 hours with 55m and eventually fastest to get to 100m views.. like i bet Ariana mustve been really overwhelmed and in disbelief. cause for years, she and her camp have been trying real hard for her to have a huge break but she and her team achieved this when they least expected it. like she’s really been through alot and i bet she is just cherishing every moment of this success. legit Ariana is on top of the world right now and is the talk 24/7. she just destroyed the pop patriarchy and did it with unconventional methods. not to mention, the message of Thank U Next is so refreshing since it talks about her exes in a positive light and this experience as her taking the high road. so yeah, she deserves all the success she is getting. thank u for coming to my TEDtalk, next
c3po:
we need to put all the money in the whole world in one paypal account and delete the account and then start again
